In another online venue (TechRepublic, to be exact), I often get embroiled in technical discussions gone wonderfully awry. I’m a common counteractant to FUD there, and there are a few others with whom I regularly interact who stalk the discussions to provide the same public service. Then, of course, there are the trolls with whom we regularly find ourselves contending.
I’m reposting here something I’ve posted there recently, because I was just highly amused. I’ll also post the text of an email sent to me by another member of the community there (anonymized, of course) who appreciated my stylish wit.
First, a response to a troll:
I bow to your well-reasoned, cool-headed, professional and mature manner. Yes, you have won the day by rigorous logic and rational rhetoric. There’s no response to arguments like yours that can possibly hope to stand up to scrutiny. Insinuating I suffer a neurochemical imbalance certainly proves your case with regards to the comparative advantages of various technologies we use in our professional lives. Disparaging commentary about the personal characteristics of Linux users as a class of people, and someone you’ve never met in particular, makes a watertight case for the impenetrability of your system configuration despite the lack of anti-malware security software.
How could I have imagined there was room to ask for more hard evidence than that? Clearly, my attempts to address the fact of the Microsoft security model and the sad necessity of antivirus software for we mere mortals when we make use of Microsoft’s operating systems and applications was misguided and failed to bring any relevant focus to salient points in this discussion. I will cease and desist in my attempts to measure up to your towering intellect and mature integrity, as wanton insults have carried the day.
You are truly a giant among men, and you get laid more than me too.
I think that one ended the subthread of the discussion. Only time will tell. Here’s that email I mentioned, from another member of that online community:
I just had to write to say”WELL DONE INDEED”. I’ve never read anythig put so properly and so appropriately stated in my life. This scum is obviously a low life who want’s nothing better than to fight.
Better to just dump him ,but man, I’ve got to give it to you, you did it with grace,style and class. And every word a slap in the kisser.
I repeat, Well Done my friend this rabble you don’t need.
He can’t come anywhere near you although obviousy he’d like to.
I congratulate you on your ablity to maintain your own integrity while telling where to go in such a fashion.
I close in saying thank you, not only for defending yourself, but it made us feel better too.